ASKED HOW YOURE DOING, WHEN YOUVE JUST BEEN IN A FUCKING AUTO ACCIDENT! PC.389 ERNEST MANNS LAUGH DAMMIT!
Surviving the Absurd: My Accident Story with an EMT from Hell
Hey there, Earnest Mann here! Today, I'm sharing a personal story that will have you shaking your head and possibly laughing. Imagine you're in a car accident—flipped on your side, still dazed—only to be met by a screeching EMT asking, "Are you okay?" This isn’t just about my brush with fate; it’s about dealing with ridiculousness when you least expect it.
The Bizarre Accident and the EMT with No Tact
I recount a crazy incident from 2006 when a drunk driver T-boned my car, flipping it onto its side. As I lay there, bruised and confused, an EMT arrived with the most absurd, tone-deaf question. Instead of providing reassurance or assessing my injuries, she shrieked down to me, echoing the last thing anyone in my situation needed to hear.
What EMTs Should Say vs. What Actually Happened
I break down how a professional response could have helped, contrasting what I heard with what might have been appropriate. From this experience, I emphasize that a calm, reassuring voice and practical questions are vital in trauma care. Reflecting on this, I ask listeners if they would find humor in my situation—or share my disbelief at the incompetence.
Appreciating the Real Heroes in Emergency Care
In closing, I make it clear that my frustration was directed at one individual, not EMTs or paramedics as a whole. These professionals work tirelessly in challenging situations, saving lives every day, and I’m grateful for their commitment. It’s just that, sometimes, one person can make a strange situation even stranger.
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I'm a deep thinking contrarian, a very pragmatic idiocythrope. I believe that function determines desirability and legitimacy. I don't like the superficial and/or pretentious, nor the shallow. I speak the truth as best as I know it, as a professor of tautology.
With friends, I desire quality over quantity. I know some very important life truths I'm just waiting for you to ask about. I have found in life, many people talk about happiness, but are unwilling to pay the price, or believe they shouldn't have to, because they are entitled to it, but I know with absolute certainty, that such beliefs are always due to stupidity, Insanity, or some degree of both.
This is not just another YouTube channel; I'm seeking to build a community of Intelligent thinkers daring to discuss, - and say - what the hell really needs to be said, so do the right thing, leave your thoughts, for me and others to possibly learn from, and subscribe, and tell everyone else in the world you know about me, and you'll stand a really good chance, of me remembering you, in my will!
I believe we really can change the current status quo of an idiotic and fucked up purposeless treadmill existence, and actually improve this world, but it requires intelligence, honesty, and BALLS, all three of which are currently in short supply, especially the balls.
Thank you for taking the time, to read this, and remember to avoid anything or anyone stupid, as much as possible, your life will be far better for it.
Please consider, that by visiting my website and/or donating to this show, you're supporting an actual person, not some mega corporation, that wouldn't know human compassion if it hit them over the head!
I look forward to hearing from you, and until next Monday or Friday remember, the world may be misinformed and batshit crazy, but YOU, don’t have to be!
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If you have a suggestion for an episode topic, you can also reach out to me via my website's contact page - https://theearnestmannshow.com/aboutcontact - I always respond.
© 2024 The Earnest Mann Show
Transcript
0:00
hello you are courageous curious and
0:03
intelligent not chicken [ __ ]
0:05
uninterested and stupid thank you for
0:08
being here we've all said stupid things
0:11
at the wrong time it's totally
0:13
understandable but when you're being
0:14
asked very stupid question by a
0:17
supposedly well-trained professional at
0:20
the worst time that's something entirely
0:23
different here's a true story involving
0:25
yours truly so listen up because if what
0:28
I'm about to tell you ever happens to
0:31
you hopefully you'll bear in mind that
0:34
your life is potentially in the hands of
0:36
a complete [ __ ]
0:45
idiot it's one thing I think we could
0:48
all use right now it's a good laugh
0:51
unfortunately I'm not a very good
0:54
comedian so with the exception of Doug
0:56
stanh hope and a few others there's
0:58
simply nowhere to get get your [ __ ]
1:00
comedy fix these days so you'll have to
1:03
rely on me an old third string comedy
1:06
quarterback whose best days are
1:08
definitely behind him and even those
1:11
days weren't that [ __ ] great I was
1:13
like a poor man's leis black and I mean
1:17
a really [ __ ] poor
1:20
man so here's my story I believe this
1:25
was around:1:29
to dance
1:30
and it was getting close to dark but it
1:33
wasn't actually night so visibility
1:37
wasn't the issue the other driver being
1:40
a [ __ ] drunk
1:42
was I was only about 2 or 3 minutes away
1:45
from my house I was on a two lane road
1:50
and I got into the left hand turning
1:52
lane to turn well left the light was
1:56
already green so I didn't have to stop
2:00
and just as soon as I started my left
2:03
hand turned to cross the road I was
2:06
T-boned by the drunk guy on the
2:09
passenger side with his full siiz pickup
2:13
going about 50
2:15
mph the impact caused my car to turn
2:19
over on the driver's side so the
2:22
passenger side was facing the
2:25
sky eventually EMTs showed up that's
2:30
when the crazy happened I heard a very
2:33
shrill woman's voice calling down to me
2:37
hello this is Jesse with emergency
2:41
medical are you
2:44
okay now my voice can't come anywhere
2:48
close to her obnoxious shriek but let me
2:53
break this down into a more detailed
2:56
picture when something like this happens
2:59
the last thing a person needs to hear is
3:02
a screeching Banshee asking you an
3:06
idiotic [ __ ] question which I'm about
3:09
to
3:10
explain you see as far as my condition
3:14
was concerned fortunately there was
3:17
nothing life-threatening I was very
3:20
disoriented I had a good bit of heavy
3:23
bruising some minor cuts and scratches
3:26
but other than that I was basically okay
3:30
no body parts broken no severe head
3:34
trauma I eventually summarized that
3:37
there was two main reasons for this I
3:40
was driving a very safe car a 740 Volvo
3:44
Volvos being known for their safety at
3:47
least back then and that I was hit on
3:51
the passenger side the passenger side
3:54
was totally caved in so of course the
3:57
car was total had I been hit on the
4:00
driver's side Volvo or not I'm pretty
4:04
certain I would have been a completely
4:07
different story but for now let me get
4:10
back to the EMT from
4:13
Hill the main thing I remember was being
4:17
startled remember I'm still woozy
4:20
because I was just hit by a full-size
4:23
pickup going 50 m a [ __ ] hour anyway
4:28
I was jolted yes I'm not kidding
4:31
actually jolted by the shrillness of
4:35
this banshee's voice now for those of
4:39
you who are not Irish or unfamiliar with
4:42
the term banshi let me very briefly
4:46
explain what it
4:48
means a bansi a banshi is a supernatural
4:53
being in Irish Boat were often depicted
4:56
as a screeching female Spirit who
4:59
appears as an omen or harbinger of death
5:04
not exactly a great feeling when you're
5:07
really out of it and you don't know how
5:10
extensive your injuries are let's just
5:13
say that she alone put the fear of death
5:17
into
5:18
me so now that I've explained that to
5:21
you allow me to go into a little bit
5:24
more detail so perhaps you'll understand
5:27
why I didn't and still don't have warm
5:32
fuzzy feelings for the idiot posing as a
5:36
professional EMT person that showed up
5:39
to assist me all those years
5:43
ago you've just been involved in a
5:47
serious accident and the person that is
5:49
supposed to potentially save your life
5:53
is asking you if you're
5:57
okay I was hit hard enough to put my
6:00
[ __ ] car on its side so I think
6:03
there's a pretty good chance of all the
6:06
things that could be said to me you
6:09
don't want to ask me in a high pitched
6:12
screeching voice if I'm
6:16
okay I may or may not be conscious have
6:20
broken bones or internal injuries but I
6:23
am definitely traumatized so I'm
6:26
probably not okay
6:29
and as an emergency medical technician
6:33
one should think they should [ __ ]
6:36
know
6:37
that so for example if she would have
6:40
said in a non Banshee voice are you
6:44
conscious sir do you think anything is
6:46
broken or are you in serious pain those
6:50
are short and concise intelligent and
6:53
reasonable questions to which I would
6:56
have responded Yes I'm conscious
7:00
no I don't think anything's broken and
7:03
I'm not in very serious pain to which
7:07
she should have responded with something
7:10
like okay they're going to get your car
7:13
back on all four wheels as quickly and
7:16
safely as possible then we'll get you
7:19
out of there and take you to the
7:22
hospital that's it that's all she had to
7:25
say but no of course she didn't do that
7:29
she just continued screeching out
7:32
idiotic
7:34
questions I'm very surprised she didn't
7:37
ask me my astrological sign or if I had
7:40
read the [ __ ] karma
7:43
sutra now most people I told this uh
7:48
absolutely true story to back then laugh
7:52
their ass off because it just occurred
7:55
to me that at the time I guess I just
7:58
must have went along with things and
8:01
laughed with them but now since many of
8:04
these people are no longer in my life I
8:07
realize that at the time there was
8:11
nothing remotely funny about it as far
8:14
as I'm concerned so all these years
8:17
later I'm trying to get an objective
8:21
answer so I'm asking you do you think
8:25
what I just told you was funny and if so
8:29
what the hell exactly makes it so
8:32
funny by all means don't hold back if
8:37
I'm that [ __ ] dense then I absolutely
8:40
want to know that way if the same thing
8:44
should ever happen again and I get
8:47
another idiotic
8:49
EMT I'll try to stay calm and remember
8:53
what you told me but what you're going
8:56
to tell me better be enlightening
8:58
because I I don't think I'm wrong that
9:01
woman was an
9:03
idiot so because I don't want to talk
9:06
your ear off I want to wrap this story
9:09
up now but before I go I feel that in
9:13
all fairness I would like to say
9:15
something about paramedics and EMTs in
9:19
general in all seriousness the vast
9:22
majority of paramedics and EMTs are very
9:25
good people it is an extremely demanding
9:28
occupation
9:30
both physically and mentally and
9:32
generally speaking they absolutely go
9:35
above and beyond to help the seriously
9:38
injured a literal stabilizing lifeline
9:42
on the way to the
9:44
hospital I just wanted to make very
9:47
clear to everyone out there that in my
9:50
opinion they are Stellar human beings
9:54
that often don't get the appreciation
9:57
they deserve so I just wanted to to say
9:59
a deep thank you to all the paramedics
10:02
and EMTs out there you are sincerely
10:05
appreciated as far as accidents don't
10:09
let that be the reason you're here watch
10:12
new episodes every Monday and Friday at
10:15
6 a.m. on YouTube or listen to my
10:18
episodes on my website for more
10:21
interesting stuff just like this think
10:24
of listening to my episodes as accident
10:28
insurance for your
10:30
life until next time this is earnest and
10:34
I usually am
10:36
[Music]
